After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Randomize