yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize