Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
