I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
