Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
