she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
