We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
