Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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