It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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