im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
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