just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
