Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize