at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
