Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
