They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize