I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Randomize
