So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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