i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
