That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
