Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
