I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize