I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
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