butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Randomize
