Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
