i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
