she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
