Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
