update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
