Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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