I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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