she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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