Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
