i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
