Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
