I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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