3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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