I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize
