scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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