He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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