found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
