He uses pillows to masturbate.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
