the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Still dying that you shit outside
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
