Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
