White coat. Heels.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
My penis needs a shock collar
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
