all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
