I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize