Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize