yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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