I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
