Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
