I will die if light touches me.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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